Welcome to the grand final of the Mars Voice competition here at the MSG cauldron of sport.

Team Belta and Team Squeal represent the pinnacle of what this competition has to offer.

With me in the box tonight are Dean Spaghetti and Pavarotti (3 time champion) alongside is Lungi acting as rover. Both teams have proven their fitness throughout the competition and we’re in for a cracker tonight.

They’re out on the field, warming up and as you can hear there’s a bit of jockeying for position. There’s a high C already, a bit early on wouldn’t you think Lungi?

‘Yeah, no, a few high notes is indicative of Team Belta’s recent form I think, Brucie. But you’re right, there’s a bit of push and shove goin’ on. Can’t wait!’

Good work Lungi, thanks mate.

There’s the siren. Team Squeal won the toss and are going straight to Ballad – good choice Dean?

‘Yeah, ballad’s a great idea, get Belta off guard. If they can maintain this level of intensity, they’ll have a good chance. Team Belta’s been a bit down on form since the quarters, but we all know what tough stuff they’re made of.’

Good one Deano. Bit of push and shove here. 23’s broken into quavers, passed them on to Spink. Can’t handle the pace, a little fumble there, put in a toe-poke. Tune intercepted nicely by Belta’s low note specialist. What he doesn’t know about the bass parts isn’t worth knowing. Lungi, how’s things on the side line?

‘Definitely rough down here. Nice pass there from the Squeals. Now was that musical? I don’t think so. Back to you Brucie.’

Pav, your expert opinion about that last set of arpeggios?

‘Well, Brucie. Squeal’s normally a lot better but nerves are obviously factor tonight. Normally I’d expect a smoother transition between octaves, but this team’s young and their inexperience could be showing tonight.’

Well said Pav. Things are getting a bit physical – look at the hit on Belta’s lead singer – suspension coming up wouldn’t you say Dean?

‘Definitely Brucie. Yeah, bit’ove claret dripping from the leads nose, could be broken. Sensational stuff this.’

Scores are level at quarter time. Looking forward to Pav’s comments from the sheds.

When music echoes sport, what happens to art?